If someone tells you that you can get married for under $5000 and you expect to actually feed, provide drink and have places to sit for your family and friends, and maybe have some lovely music, and maybe take some pictures of the whole she-bang (in Sonoma no less), and you don't want to have every guest double as a caterer, bartender, photographer, videographer, DJ, or laborer, laugh out loud and quite heartily.
400 pounds of ice you say? At $17 per 40 pounds? No problem, here's my checkbook, please take my hard earned $170 for frozen water. Might as well have a nice trip to Alaska at the same time. Oh, and linens, for the tables that selfish people NEED to eat on? Yeah, try $300. I told the caterer I'd bring some sheets from home. Oh and thanks for charging 50 cents per chair to move them from the ceremony site to the reception site, a mere 15 yards. Also, that service charge that you have already included? Yeah, see, I am totally onto you, I will not be tipping on the food twice. Trickery. And how the hell does cheese cost $4 a person? Even with fancy fruit and crackers? Add some dancing girls and you got a deal. Also, for the cupcakes, people do not need plates and forks. And if they do, they do not belong at my wedding.
And that's just the food. We have not even found an officiant or music yet. And we need to get our rings. And a videographer. And send out invitations. And what the hell is Chris going to wear?
THIS IS WHY I WANTED TO GO TO VEGAS, PEOPLE. Is it too late?
Recent Comments